What If You Dislike Something That Everyone Else Loves?
Some thoughts on being a negative outlier. Plus some pneumatic tube follow-ups and more.
I have a confession to make: I don’t drink coffee. It’s not because I’m avoiding caffeine, or that I’m engaged in some kind of principled boycott — I just never learned to like the taste.
Frankly, I wish I liked drinking coffee, because it seems like the kind of ritualistic pleasure I tend to enjoy. But whenever I try it (which I usually do once a year or so, just to see if my tastes have changed), I find it too bitter, even with milk and sugar. It’s just not my thing.
This makes me a negative outlier, because pretty much everyone likes coffee. And while people will sometimes give you a few virtue points for abstaining from things like meat or alcohol, not drinking coffee just marks you as a freak, like there’s something wrong with you. (Or me.) It’s similar to not liking the Beatles, or Raiders of the Lost Ark, or Glacier National Park, or ice cream (all of which, fortunately, I love, just like everyone else).
Being a negative outlier (i.e., having an atypical antipathy) is very different than being a positive outlier (i.e., having an atypical enthusiasm). If you’re into, say, obsessing over small design details (ahem) or some other type of niche pursuit, there are all sorts of websites, Facebook groups, and subcultural communities available to you. But if you’re not into something that everyone else is into, you’re usually on your own — a cultural wallflower.
In addition, being a negative outlier often involves some element of embarrassment or shame, like you’re in the wrong and therefore need to apologize. That’s why I described the first sentence of this post as a “confession.” You’ve heard of a guilty pleasure? Not liking coffee (or the Beatles, etc.) is basically a guilty displeasure. I know I’m supposed to like it, but for some reason I don’t, so that must indicate some deficiency on my part. It’s not you, it’s me. Sorry.
I feel like most of us have a few dislikes, or at least indifferences, that put us into the negative outlier category. Today I’m going to list a few of mine (some food-related and some drawn from other cultural realms), and hopefully you folks will list some of yours as well, so we can all take some comfort in each other’s freakishness.
Before I get to my list, two quick ground rules:
This list is only for true outlier positions, not just dislikes. For example, I don’t like mayonnaise or coconut, but there’s nothing freakish about that, because lots of people dislike those things. I’m not saying everyone dislikes them, but they’re definitely not in the same category as disliking coffee, so they’re not on the list.
Similarly, this list is not for pet peeves, like people who look at their phones during movies or say, “Right?” in the middle of every other sentence. It’s for dislikes that run counter to near-universal cultural norms.
If you like most of the things on my list (which you probably do — that’s the point!), don’t worry, I’m not judging you. And even if I were, who cares? Everyone else agrees with you, not with me!
With all that in mind, here are some things I don’t like, even though everybody else does.
Cheese
Everybody loves cheese — many people even view it as an indulgence — but I can’t get past the smell, which I find completely off-putting. Now, just to be clear, I love all the standard mozzarella-topped Italian foods (pizza, veal parmigiana, etc.), and I also like a Philly cheesesteak with provolone. But come on, those cheeses are so mild that they barely count as cheese. For any real cheese — even something as simple as cheddar or American — count me out. That means no cheeseburgers, no cheese nachos, not even a grilled cheese sandwich. Please, no cheese!