Major Inconspicuous Consumption Announcement!
I have some exciting news to share with you.
As you surely know by now, Inconspicuous Consumption’s all-purpose symbol is the eternal Brannock Device — that gizmo they use to measure your shoe size — which I consider to be the ultimate inconspicuous object and has long been my personal North Star. (For more details on that, check out IC’s “About” page.)
My Brannock boosterism runs deep. The very first piece of professional writing I ever did — a product review for the alt-weekly NYPress in 1993 — was about the Brannock Device. Ten years after that, in 2003, I got a Brannock Device tattoo as a birthday present to myself. I had the tattoo re-inked in 2018, which was the year I convinced the Syracuse Chiefs minor league baseball team to play a game in Brannock-themed uniforms. The team had me throw out the first pitch for that game, plus I got to engage in some Brannock chatter on the game’s radio broadcast. I also realized a longtime dream during that trip to Syracuse by getting a personal tour of the Brannock Device factory, which felt almost like a holy pilgrimage.
All of that feels like a prelude to what I’m about to tell you.
Without further ado: I’m extremely proud to announce today that the Brannock Device is now the Official Foot Measuring Tool of Inconspicuous Consumption!
“The Brannock Device Co. is proud to be partnering with Inconspicuous Consumption by Paul Lukas,” said Brannock Device Co. president Tim Follett (the guy who gave me that factory tour back in 2018). “In addition to being a dedicated and passionate Brannock Device enthusiast, Paul has used his insightful sensibility and entertaining coverage of numerous unique items to captivate readers around the world for many years. We are pleased to support his work.”
Isn’t that nice? After so many years as the world’s biggest (only?) Brannock evangelist, I’m excited to have an official relationship with the company. It feels like a validation, a seal of approval — not just for me and my work, but for the whole notion of observing the world in a curious, thoughtful, and enthusiastic manner. Huzzah!
This is the first “official [x] of [y]” partnership I’ve ever entered into, probably because it’s the only one I can imagine ever wanting to enter into. I got the idea for it a few weeks ago, around the same time that I acquired the inconspicuous.info domain name — all part of my official program to make IC feel more official. When I pitched the idea to Tim Follett, I thought he might dismiss the whole thing as silliness, but instead he embraced it. I’m super-grateful to him and his wife, Antoinette Follett, for their support and enthusiasm, and I’m extremely proud to be associated with them.
Tim also gave me the green light to sell Brannock-themed Inconspicuous Consumption T-shirts. More info on that soon.
Paul Lukas has been obsessing over the inconspicuous for most of his life, and has been writing about those obsessions for more than 30 years. You can contact him here.
I remember using the Brannock device in my youth, just missing the predecessor "Foot-o-scope" which used x-rays to assess foot size, understandably abandoned due to radiation concerns.
I remember the cool feel of the Brannock metal and feeling the little ridges beneath, and then the device that snugged the metatarsal on the inside of the foot to determine the width. Haven't seen one in years. Time for a comeback!
I still call it IC.